A Night to Remember…And Forget

Dear Abramella & Babram,

Tonight was one of those nights that I want to forget but also remember forever.

Around mid-afternoon, Mia, you started to feel really warm and had a 102 degree fever.  You weren’t acting any different, were playing and eating normal.  But, you were definitely hot.  As the night went on, your temperature got higher.  Around 8:00, your temperature hit 104.  We paged the doctor.  Ten minutes later, your temperature went up to 105.3.  I was getting ready to take you to pediatric urgent care when the doctor called back.  She asked us to try to give you a bath first and motrin.  If that didn’t help, then go to urgent care.  You didn’t love the bath, but it was working.  You liked the motrin even less, but it worked even better.  I want to erase this night from my memory.  Just thinking about it and the way I felt in that moment brings me to full tears.  I’d be lying if I said I didn’t automatically think “the worst.”  Let me tell you, there is NOTHING on this planet worse than “the worst.”  Your fever settled down and I took you to the doctor the next day.  You had a sinus infection – and now a super snotty nose to go along with that fever.  You also developed a growth on your cheek – mommy’s lips.  Pretty sure I held and kissed you all night.  Oh, and I looked into it, no doctor will remove that growth, you’re stuck with me (…or i’m stuck on you…).

Dylan, my conversation with you this night is one I want to remember forever.  Daddy had to run out to get infant Motrin for Mia and mommy needed to give Mia a bath.  You were having a harder time going to sleep and wanted me to sit with you and read with you longer.  I gently explained to you, “Mommy needs you to be a really big boy tonight.  I need you to share mommy with baby during your bedtime.  Baby doesn’t feel well and is crying.  Can you please share mommy?”  You stopped crying and responded, “I’m okay mommy.  It’s baby’s turn, she needs you mommy.  I’m okay to go bedtime.”  You gave me a kiss and went right to bed with no fuss.  I was, and am, so proud of the considerate, loving boy you are.

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